Welcome to another Weekly Time Waster! My name is Scott or Canadian Scott if you prefer and my area of nerd love comes from watching movies. I love them all; sometimes the worse a movie is, the more I love it. This weekly column is going to be bringing you some of the new release movies from the week relevant to us in the nerd world. I won’t be giving you spoilers but instead you’ll get to see some trailers and my thoughts on the movie. Enjoy and feel free to let me know of any others you think I missed.
This week sees some great new releases. Of course we have season 3 of The Walking Dead coming out today for my fellow zombie enthusiasts and we have season 5 of Sons of Anarchy for the motor heads but then again you don’t come here to check those movies out but instead the best of the worst. We have Christian Slater on the moon, Tia Carrere clearly doing someone a favour by starring in a movie, one of the last movies of Michael Clarke Duncan and we get a “throwback” movie from the 80s which I think the makers of the movie could’ve probably spent a few minutes watching before making their movie.
Christian Slater…what are you doing?! He plays the leader at a moon base when it is disabled following a meteor shower and staff becomes infected by some tiny organism which I guess wants to take over earth by making the people it comes in contact with kill each other? I thought aliens were supposed to be smarter. Can you name the sci-fi movie the screenplay writers ripped off to make this movie? I see Event Horizon, I see Prometheus, and I see Alien and that is just from the trailer. I believe the movie will have even more…
In another where are they now moment, Tia Carrere and Dee Wallace star in this student film about well a lot of things I guess? We have a solar flare that knocks out all electronics in the world, yet plans and cars can work…we have planes flying all over the place without the ability to land…we have passengers on said plane that are fighting each other because clearly the Electro Magnetic Pulse is from the one Arab American on the flight…we have other airline pilots that clearly don’t know what they’re doing and what does the US government say, well nothing because clearly they don’t care and two knuckle heads are responsible for all the air traffic as there is no such thing as disaster protocols and finally, a grandmother and daughter who must brave this new partially non electrical world to get to the airport. The acting, melodramatic at best, the graphics, clearly done by students, was this on SyFy before this release?
Mischa Barton plays a school psychologist which is just as goofy as Denise Richards playing a scientist called Christmas Jones and Michael Clarke Duncan should not be remembered by this movie. When one brother dies by the hands of their friends, they decide to bully and beat up the younger brother…okay? Then the younger brother brings his older brother back to life to seek revenge against those that killed him. Like Christina Slater’s movie, can you spot the direct rip offs used in the screenplay? I know What You Did Last Summer, Scream, and Halloween, just to name a few.
In this movie, a group of friends are collected together for a 80s themed murder mystery party but as the party starts, we discover that not everything as it seems and the host of the party has some ulterior motives. You know I enjoyed this movie when it was called April Fool’s Day. The problem I have with this is we are looking at making things overly graphic and torture porn when this is something horror movies really need to shy away from again and go for the more subtle stuff that made the golden age of horror so spectacular even today. Apparently modern scream queen Danielle Harris stars and presents this movie. Admittedly I needed to look at who she is just to know what qualifies her as a scream queen but when I see the Halloween remakes and the Hatchet movies then I know we’re dealing with something that is not really the horror I enjoy. So viewers beware.
That’s all for this week folks! Hope you enjoy some of the selections this week and be sure to let me know what you thought. Don’t forget to hit the comments and let me know if I missed something or if there is a movie out there you think I should check out. Also, make sure you check out some of my friends on Nerditis while checking me out and I’ll see you next week! Also, keep an eye out for new Tales from the Northside and the new column The Northern Dead!