Weekly Time Waster

Welcome to another Weekly Time Waster!  My name is Scott or Canadian Scott if you prefer and my area of nerd love comes from watching movies.  I love them all; sometimes the worse a movie is, the more I love it.  This weekly column is going to be bringing you some of the new release movies from the week relevant to us in the nerd world.  I won’t be giving you spoilers but instead you’ll get to see some trailers and my thoughts on the movie.  Enjoy and feel free to let me know of any others you think I missed.

And I really thought last week was a weak week for new release movies…apparently the studios are on a two-week vacation.  So because the movie selection is a little thin, I have decided to alter the format a little this week.  I do have a couple great new release movies including another spin on the zombie genre (and not for the better) and a third movie in a little discussed slasher franchise (featuring a horror legend) but I decided to check out some new streaming options on Netflix and man did I find some good ones including genre vets starring in a strange love triangle and we finish with a movie that if the director needs to go to Youtube comments to defend his movie then you know you’re going to have a bad time.

Knight of the Dead

http://youtu.be/H2I949iaYCo

Well as you can see the title is not really hiding anything here so in the vein of a few weeks back when Robin Hood took on the living dead, we are now faced with a group of knights fighting the undead.  When you first start to watch it, you think “oh cool, a holy grail story” but then you think, “okay so they’re in a castle with people suffering the plague, gritty but cool” then you see zombies and your final thought is “okay what the hell is wrong with Hollywood?!?”  Why they kept mentioning the Holy Grail I really don’t know because this should be about zombies but I swear if the grail is a cure to zombies then I will eat my chain mail hat.

Hatchet 3

http://youtu.be/1SSEm5vzNBM

Quietly making waves in the horror world is the Hatchet franchise.  Now I will admit that I have not watched the first two movies and frankly when you have seen enough you know you probably don’t need to because there will be lots of flashbacks and story recall.  What I find interesting here is the Hatchet character is a throw back to some early slasher characters like Jason, Michael Myers, and Freddie.  These are supernatural beings that no matter what you do they just won’t die and looks like we get that again with a modern twist and spin.  Kane Hodder plays the Hatchet man and I’m going to tell you right now that he is not that tall, I had the pleasure to meet him at Niagara Comic Con a couple of months back and he was a super nice guy but he was also wearing 5” platform shoes which definitely destroy the mystique a bit.  This movie appears to know what it is so I don’t see fault but don’t watch this expecting A plus material.

Animals

http://youtu.be/qMsBZryldqo

You know I wonder what happens to guys from genre TV and movies when the show finishes.  Do they move onto other bigger and better things?  Or do they fall into obscurity?  In this movie we have Sayed from Lost, the soldier dude from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and someone from Supernatural starring in this mash-up of True Blood, The Howling and Twilight.  From what I see, a former town hero hooks up with a girl who gives him supernatural powers.  Then Sayed decides to come and kill the two people because he too has the same powers.  I’m lost (pun unintended).  Apparently this is based on a series of books so maybe this is a case of the book is better?

Age of Dinosaurs

http://youtu.be/udQ1e-XUybE

So in this “not The Lost World rip-off”, a genetic company has regrown hilarious looking dinosaurs for reasons which I can only assume is done for money.  These dinosaurs then escape from their plexiglass enclosure and Treat Williams is left to channel his inner Harrison Ford and FIND MY DAUGHTER!! I enjoy how the unnamed police force literally empties 100s of thousands of ammo into a dinosaur when I don’t think they evolved bullet proof vests in the Jurassic era.  Adding to this delight is if you read the comments you see Joseph Lawson who was the director of this movie trying his very hardest to make lemonade out of lemons but let me just say that this movie is still all lemon.  Even he really avoids the plot hole questions instead saying they made the film for the love of film.  Well sir, if you love film so much, try a little harder next time.

That’s all for this week folks!  Take the time to look up some of the selections this week and be sure to let me know what you thought.  How did you like the addition of choosing some new to streaming ficks?  Don’t forget to hit the comments and let me know if I missed something or if there is a movie out there you think I should check out.  Also, make sure you check out some of my friends on Nerditis and I’ll see you next week!

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