This Could Be The End of Your ‘Tossing Controllers Out The Window’ Problems

This could be the cure to my "Controllers Embedded In Wall" problem!

This could also be the cure to my “Controllers Embedded In Drywall” problem!

Aspiring visual designer Samuel Matson has recently developed “Immersion”, a bio-metrics headset sensor that measures your rage levels and helped adjust the game’s difficulty accordingly. What this means is it is essentially the cure for gamer rage, a source of income for drywall carpenters and a problem that most gamers are all too familiar with. The gamer rage is the problem, I mean, not the drywall carpenter. Bob was pretty nice; he gives me discounts all the time.

Phil, though, was kind of a dick.

Phil, though, was kind of a dick.

Matson described in the page that the sensor helped the game adjust to you and your condition, in that the more you rage the more difficult the enemies and the game itself become. What I take away from that is pretty much a gamer’s version of a shock collar, telling you to behave or the game is going to behave as equally dickish as you are right now. I seriously have mixed feelings about a device that basically debase us into household pets needing to be broken in with extreme disciplinary actions.

But then again, I’ve tore up too many curtains, broken too many furniture, and pooped on one too many carpets after playing just one short round of Dark Souls, so there’s that.

THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!!

THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS!!

3 responses to “This Could Be The End of Your ‘Tossing Controllers Out The Window’ Problems

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