Life In Plastic: TOY REVIEW: Terraria


Hey, remember how I’ve reviewed Minecraft toys despite not actually playing the game?  Well, AHAHAHAHAHA!

Terraria is kind of like Minecraft, except a side-scroller, and much more combat-oriented. The point of Terraria is to fight its bajillion boss monsters, and get enough equipment to take on tougher ones. It’s also got a little bit of a Cthulhu Mythos bent. Its toys have been hanging around the shelves for a few hours now, so I finally took a mini-plunge: two boss monsters, two human-sized characters. They share almost the exact same pixellated style as Mineraft toys, which is unfortunate – Terraria characters are drawn differently, and in fact these toys are “lower resolution” than the actual in-game graphics! It’s distracting after you’ve seen them. But other than that, let’s take a look!



Skeletron is a gigantic skull and hand combo – and again, he’s less blocky in the game. This figure is just his head (no hand), though it does come with some accessories as well as a “secret compartment” feature.


The blockiness is charming, but it’s just not as rounded as he is in-game. It shouldn’t bug me, and yet it does.


Hilariously, he’s got skulls. Also hilariously, they make sense in context – one’s an item drop, one’s a standard enemy.


The “medium” skull is actually a Skeletron mask, and is wearable by players. It’s almost Glyos Compatible – or rather, if you have a male-to-male connector piece, it totally is.


The tiny skull is an enemy. So, why did they include both? Well, why not? Honestly, the more swag that comes with these figures, the better, something the line does not ignore.


Aaaand… the rest of the stuff. Flat, with details printed on, they’re too low-res again. The book, key, and skeleton arm all drop from Skeletron (so you sort of have his hand… only not quite). THe book especially is printed awkwardly – in-game, it looks like a book. Here, it looks like some sort of weird printed trophy plate.

And here’s an ordinary figure using Skeletron’s various accessories – and they fit into those hands pretty well. The skull is actually less blocky than a regular Terraria figure, though the same criticism applies to them.


That particular figure is the Witch Doctor, an NPC you can hire to sell you some potions. His design is pretty unique, not least because he’s clearly a lizard man in a mask.


See? A tail. But the Witch Doctor is a little blockier than he should be.


The Witch Doctor also comes with stuff – some of the things he can sell, his staff, and a cauldron.


The Cauldron is pretty good, and nicely large for a mere “accessory.”


The weird green thing is supposed to be a blow gun. Honestly, it was surprisingly hard to figure this out – again, they went too retro with the “graphics” for the toys.


THe idol might as well be made of gingerbread!


But the complete package, when put together, is pretty good. The Witch Doctor comes with a lot of stuff, and you can swap his head around, too.


The Eye of Cthulhu shows a lot of Loveraft lip srvice without actually delivering – though granted, the game does ultimately toss in some cosmic horrors. But the Eye is a gigantic eye, and what could be wrong with that? It’s got a secret compartment, too.


Those veins are really too blocky – they should be thinner, and branch out more. As they are, they look sadly cheap.


The Eye comes with a ton of item drops, too – a tophy (his tooth mounted on a plaque), binoculars, a demon bow, and a potion flask that’s actually 3D, and thus better than many of the other accessories in this line.


After you’ve damaged it a bit, the Eye gains a toothy mouth. This would have been an awesome toy itself, but it soerta does come with that form – a mini Demon Eye, a regular enemy which just happens to look the same. This toy langolier is honestly pretty awesome, and yes, it is a swappable head.


Also, it’s round. See, was that so hard?


And here’s the Goblin Tinker, who’s just so hilariously mundane that he’s awesome in and of himself! Seriously, he’s just a blue nerd in office garb. For some reason, this works great with the Demon Eye head.


He’s got a strange postmodern charm, and his blockiness seems like some sort of statement on office life. In fact, I think cubicle-based block figures were a thing about ten years ago, weren’t they?


Our goblin buddy comes with a desk, a whip, his staff, and some charcoal. The desk is surprisingly good, but the others do blend in with all the other random flat objects in this line. Even though they are related to him, they just seem random and overly-pixellated.


So, overall? You’ve heard my one complaint. Other than that, this toyline does seem to give you a lot for the price, if at least in accessories.



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