Life In Plastic: TOY REVIEW: Alien MUSCLE (Super 7)

 

 

Merry almost Christmas, everybody!  Which has nothing to do with today’s review. Nothing at all.

 

As previously stated, I love MUSCLE.  Always have, always will.  First collection I “completed,” too.  And, last year, Super7 kindasorta revived the brand with MOTUSCLE – He-Man themed MUSCLE figures which were way too rubbery, but otherwise a nice little novelty.  Well, Super7 has done it again, grabbing a new license for another set of twelve MUSCLE!  And what’s the theme?

 

I’m in heaven.  Let’s look at the back of the box.

 

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Ahem.  Sorry.  Too bad these aren’t 4-packs, but anyway.  Moving on.

 

Before we go any further, let’s discuss the main problem here: the material.  Alien MUSCLE are not as rubbery as MOTUSCLE, but aremade of a strangely-textured, sorta-flexible sorta-not materialthat feels weirdly delicate. It certainlyaint anything like MUSCLEplastic, which is crazy consiering how many indy lines, such as Goreords, have no problem with this.  The material feels cheap and amateurish – you’ll know if you have them in hand.  It feels like bending it will stress it, as well, which might present issues with the Aliens and their tails.

But that is the only real complaint I have – it’s just a weird issue for Super7 to be experiencing.  In fact, they’ve got MUSCLE proportions and posing down much better than MOTUSCLE, which is a huge bonus for these little guys. So, let’s look at the figures!

ALIEN
Here’s the main fellow – the Alien. Once upon a time, a fellow named Nathan Newell used Photoshop to make an Alien MUSCLE. And now here we are, looking it in the face. Nate wasn’t too far off, was he? This figure is everything that an Alien MUSCLE should be, though his tail is rather thin – try not to break it(it feels kinda flexible, but I wouldn’t risk it).

RIPLEY
And here’s Ripley, wielding the flamethrower that never properly got used. FUnny, that – the Nostromo had at least two laser pistols (you can see them holstered or sitting on the table several times) and a flamethrower, but… well, no. Nobody thought to use the pistols, and the flamethrower never got strict combat usage. Best laid plans, eh? Still, here’s Ripley, wielding it – making her tough-as-nails in the original movie kind of defeats the purpose, though. The point wasn’t that she was born a battle-hardened super hero, the point was that she was an ordinary woman who rose to the occasion. Still, it’s a good figure. The flamethrower is something she held (and used on a few cocooned friends), so there’s that.

ASH
It’s Ian Holm, Bilbo Baggins himself, wielding the rolled-up magazine he used to try to murder Ripley. I couldn’t think of anything more ironically appropriate.

And here’s the Facehugger in all its Freudian glory! Strangely, its spindly legs seem genuinely flexible, and not a fragility hazard. Nice to know.

And here it is from the back – the figure is decently detailed for something so small.

KANE IN SPACE SUIT
There is no “Normal” Kane in this set, though he actually has the most variants (more than the Alien!). Mind you, he spent a lot of his time in this spacesuit, and wasn’t the only character to wear it. it’s one of the most MUSCLE-esque figures, too, and really nicely done.

PARKER
Parker looks a lot like some actual MUSCLEs – of course, the pose helps, but his proportions and face call a few to mind. Very nicely done!

ATTACKING ALIEN
The other version fo the regular Alien is in full attack mode – but his proportions are a little wonky, if you want to be honest. It’s not a bad figure at all, but it certainly does not compare to the sublime beauty that is the regular Alien MUSCLE.

BRETT
And now Harry Dean Stanton has a toy, too! Brett may seem really basic, but it’s one of the more complex figures, as it incorporates his outfit, hawaiian shirt, cap, and all! So, as generic a human as Brett may be, this figure is instantly recognizable as him.

KANE WITH FACEHUGGER
Amusingly, this figure is sculpted in a standing pose – it’s not just his feet! I guess Kane got himself a second wind, and is ready to walk around again, sort of. Admittedly, it’s a well-detailed figure, but the only way the pose could be funnier would be if his arms were up in a typical MUSCLE pose.

LAMBERT
Lambert is often hated or seen as whiny, but this is really because she’s the audience stand-in. Most people would freak out when she did. Lambert resembles some of the female Kinkeshi figures, which is amusing when you consider that they were never translated over into the MUSCLE line.

DALLAS
Because Tom Skerrit was the biggest nae at the time of the movie, Dallas was treated like the film’s hero – too bad he was the third one to die! This sculpt’s details are extremely soft, which is very unfortunate when you consider that there is at least one MUSCLE with a face just like his. Still, it’s undeniably Tom Skerrit, so I’ll give it that.

KANE WITH CHESTBURSTER
Hahahahaha, nice! For our final figure, Kane’s got an alien bursting out of his chest, but he’s in an action pose! They did a great job with the face, of course, but the hilarity of how this figure stands up just makes it completely. Nicely done!

So, what to say overall? Weird material aside, occasional sculptural issue aside, these are really fun. Come on, they’re Alien-themed MUSCLE! I can’t really complain, not when everything is said and done. Good show, Super7. Good show.

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3 responses to “Life In Plastic: TOY REVIEW: Alien MUSCLE (Super 7)

  1. Not even a smidgen as cool as motu. Or the og thang. These look like crap. All pink and generic. Alien movies suck ass. I hope these burn in hell.they could at least went A.l.i.e.n.

  2. Is that Ernst. From Ernst scraped stupid? And another Ernst from where. He goes to jail . And yet another Ernest, from where he’s a Bruce Jenner tranny

  3. Pingback: Life In Plastic: TOY REVIEW: Street Fighter MUSCLE (Super7) | Nerditis·

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